Somewhere In the Middle

The other day I heard this wonderful song from Casting Crowns and thought I have to share this. The song is not new to me, it just had been out of sight, out of mind for a while. To me this song represents where I find myself a lot of the time and I’m guessing you probably do too. We’re better than we were, but nowhere near where we want to be.

The most telling line in the whole song is a line that asks God a painfully poignant question. Just how close can I get Lord, to my surrender, without losing all control. Isn’t that really where we’re at? We want to surrender all, we really do, but we fear what will happen if we give Him control. The truth is control for us is an illusion. Surrendering all to God is the wisest thing we can do, and we know it. but for some reason it’s really hard to do it. There are things we want to control.

I remember a time in my life when I had a life threatening illness. In the midst of that, my heart and mind were drawn to my youngest son, ten years old at the time. My oldest was a grown man by this point. He’d be okay, but my youngest, he was still a little boy. “If I die, what will happen to him?” “Who will raise him?” Everything I thought I controlled was in question. I felt God in my Spirit reminded me that He loves my son more than I do. I wanted so bad to control that outcome, but I couldn’t. I needed to trust him and everyone else I love to the One who loves them more and I still do. How close can I get? As long as I am holding onto control I am not fully surrendered and fully surrendered is where I need to be.

Until I get there, I’ll be caught in the middle. This song will challenge you. Listen to it and ask God to show you the areas you’re still trying to control.

A Lesson on Control

I was trying to illustrate the idol of control for today’s presentation at the youth retreat at Pocono Mountain Bible Conference, and I ended up using one of my favorite projects. Look at the finished product and it looks like a somewhat mediocre cartoon painting of an owl. What it really represents is giving up control.

You see, when I make a painting, I try to control as many variables as possible. I sketch, I research, I have reference materials and I take my time and do the best work I possibly can. With this piece, I invited five students up to the canvas and allowed them to each make a mark on the canvas. I then used their marks to make the finished piece. It’s always tough to see the finished piece from their lines. I usually take a few seconds to pray and then I begin to move paint around the surface. From this piece I originally saw a fox, but then as I began to work the paint I began to see owl, which is what I finally did. Given the parameters of the project, and time limitations, I think it was pretty successful and it definitely proved the point I was trying to make.

The piece illustrates the fact that control is an illusion and that the only thing we truly control is what we do with what comes at us. We do the best we can with what we have and we prepare our skills as best we can to deal with the eventualities of life. Sometimes we have some measure of control and other times we have to play the cards we’re dealt. In all things though we can acknowledge that God is in control, seek Him for wisdom and more forward in faithfulness.

I ended up giving the piece to be given as a prize for some camper competitions and pray it blesses whoever won it.

Tell a Better Story: Brad Stine

Brad Stine is a stand up comic who makes a lot of sense. In recent days people have been talking a lot about gun control and a whole bunch of other things that they want to do all based around trying to fix our society. If I thought for even a second it would work I’d be first in line, but it won’t. The break in our society is much deeper than all that. Listen to this clip of Brad Stine (especially around 3:10)

Without God all we can do is flail around blindly trying to fix the external things. The need is much deeper.

Stine uses humorous rants to draw attention to the needs of our society. How will you use your gifts to address the things that are on your heart?

Message of the Week. Cast of Characters: Jacob: What Comes Around Goes Around and Around…

Over the last few weeks at my church we have been doing a study based on Max Lucado’s Cast of Characters: Lost and Found: Encounters with the Living God
This particular message focusses on wrestling with God from the story of Jacob in Genesis 32. Have you ever wrestled with God? Have you ever struggled with giving him control over an area of your life? I did. At one point I joined God in an epic battle for control of my art career. He won and because He won, I won a fuller more complete life. Wrestling with God saved my life. Join me as I explore this timely topic. As always your feed back is appreciated.

Control

I’ll admit it, some days I can be a control freak, but recently I have been being pushed and prodded on it. You see, I’m teaching my son to drive. In Pennsylvania a driver with a learners permit must log 50 hours behind the wheel before obtaining his drivers license. This has been a somewhat trying process. It’s not because he’s doing badly, It’s because of something else. See in the beginning I found myself clutching the door handle and pressing an imaginary brake pedal on the floor, and finding myself envying his driver ed teacher who has a real brake pedal on her side. This morning several months later, I rarely touched the door handle and I don’t think I pressed my iBrake (imaginary brake, yes I’m trademarking that) once. See all my clutching and iBraking was a quest for the one thing I didn’t have…control. My son is nearly ready for his license and he is becoming a good safe driver, but in order to get him there, I had to give up control.

I’m experiencing something similar today with a live performance art project. I was asked a few months back. Usually I do this type of thing solo but this time I will be collaborating with another artist. We came up with a few ideas settled in on one and I did some sketches. I sketched something that I thought would be workable in the time allotted and the other artist had a different idea. I knew what I had to do. The artist with whom I will be collaborating will be the one who will be working with the people who will be reached tonight. I needed to give her control and I did which leaves me in a strange place.

I confess I think her designs are very aggressive, good, but aggressive and it will be a big undertaking to finish. That being said if we can make it work it is going to look fantastic. Here’s the thing. I have given her control and I will go there and serve and do my very best to make it work. Pray for me though because I have to admit this is a new place for me. Usually I have planned and replanned and then planned again. I have it down to a science by the time I step onto the stage. Tonight I am showing up with my brushes and hoping I can do it. It’s a little tough to not be in control.

In all of our undertakings, especially those things we do to serve the Lord, we face the same thing. We can plan and prepare and do all kinds of things to be ready, but the unknown factors should make us realize we are not ultimately in control. For quite some time now, I have been sharing things on this blog that really deal with our faithfulness; being faithful with what we have (talents, skills, opportunities, etc.) but there is another side to faithfulness. Ultimately we need to put all of this in God’s hands and give Him control. When we give Him control we see the other side of faithfulness, God’s faithfulness to us.

I don’t know what’s going to happen tonight, all I can do is be faithful. I do know that God loves us and the people we are doing our work for tonight and He has a plan. I am trusting Him to be faithful and giving Him control. Tomorrow, I’ll let you know what happened.