I’ve been having a chat with an atheist who has challenged one of the cartoons from the Creacher site. Well to be specific, it’s the one where the statement was made that atheism requires too much faith. The person is clearly very well read and intelligent, scientific minded, respectful and brought forth some challenging and thought provoking questions.
The part that makes me sad is I really wish I could offer scientific proof of my faith (not that I’ve really been asked for any) it’s just my faith has become so real to me that I wish I could share it on that level. The best I can do is what I experienced tonight.
I was working in my yard, planting some flowers around the small goldfish pond. I dug that pond 8 years ago, the summer after I had a heart attack at 40. I was so scared, having reactions to my meds, panic attacks, the whole thing. It was a really dark time in my life. Part of me felt like God had let me down and part of me realized the problem wasn’t with God it was with me. I had fallen back into my workaholic tendencies, rationalizing that I was doing all this stuff for God so I would be okay. The attack was a wake up call. I needed to slow down, trust God and realize that his plan for my life did not involve me working myself into an early grave.
For me digging the pond by hand was proof that I wasn’t going to break that I would survive and that I was capable of more than I thought. It remains a constant reminder of God’s goodness. When I look at that pond, I see all the things that God has done in my life since and I praise Him.
The other proof for me is my son, Chris. He graduates from High School in just a few days. My wife and I and our older son Brandon were wanting to add another child to our family. When we found out Dawn was Pregnant we were very happy but then she miscarried. I didn’t handle it well and retreated into my work. When she miscarried the second time, I was furious at God and buried myself deep in my work. Brandon and Dawn needed me and I needed God but I was so angry all I could do was plunge deeper and deeper into my work. I was losing everything and I couldn’t even see it. When we found out Dawn was pregnant for the third time, We could scarcely bring ourselves to tell anyone. When we went for the ultrasound, where we got the bad news the two previous times, I almost couldn’t bear it to be in the room and when I heard the heart beat I wept like I hadn’t wept for a long time. When Chris was born, we were told that we should probably not try to have any more children. We lost two children so that we could have Chris. I believe I’ll meet them one day, but this much I know for sure God had shown his faithfulness once again.
These are just two of the times, there are many more. I don’t know if these stories would serve as proof for my new friend. I just know I’ve seen God come through and answer my prayers too many times to be an illusion. I know He is real, I know He is exceedingly patient and I know He loves me. He loves you too.