curmudgeonThis is a little off topic for an arts ministry blog, but some things are working on my last nerve and I thought I would share them here.

Litterers: I take a walk nearly every morning and it never ceases to amaze me. People just throw their trash out the windows of their cars all over the place. Bottles, cans and some stuff that just boggle the mind. I try to be part of the solution by picking it up, but it just really irritates me. In my state the fine for littering is $300. I think it should be $50,000. Maybe that would be a better deterrent.

Special litterers: There are two things in particular that bug me:

  1. Cigarette butts: Not only do people throw them out with impunity, but they are made of fiberglass and they last forever plus the extra added advantage of the capability of starting fires. Fine: $100,000
  2. Diapers: There are few things more offensive than people throwing diapers on a parking lot. If you’re too dog gone lazy to walk to a trash can, carry your child’s feces home with you. Fine: $1,000,000

Crosswalks: Every crosswalk in America should be removed. Wow, I know, cold and heartless, right? Not really. Work with me on this. How many of you have been driving across a parking lot when a person throws his or her body in front of your moving car, just because they feel entitled to do so. I call them “crosswalk people.” Crosswalks have eliminated the need, in some minds, to take the personal responsibility to look both ways before crossing the street. Crosswalks kill… pass it on.

Stoptional: Where I live, stop signs appear to be a suggestion. Combine this incompetence with crosswalk people and you have a recipe for disaster.

Kids and Computers:
No child should have a classroom computer (or tablet or iPhone, or, etc.) before he or she can read, write (and spell), add, subtract, multiply and divide on paper and teach kids to do math the right way. If a simple problem takes them half a page of strange calculations, well good luck getting (or keeping) a job.

“Smart” Phone Etiquette: If you can’t live without your smart phone for the length of a family meal, throw it out your window on the way home. There is a real person right in front of you. Talk to him/her. Anything else can wait. No one is that important.

Speaking of Phones: It is now illegal in most states to talk on a cell phone while driving. Am I the only one who remembers that when they were first invented they were called “Car Phones?” The cell phone will go down in history as the greatest invention ever to destroy civilization.

And one last thing: Your bluetooth still makes you look crazy, and talking on your phone to someone while you’re on the toilet is just gross.

Am I a curmudgeon? Probably sometimes. You be the judge. Sometimes injecting humor and exaggeration is a great way to deal with stress.

What drives you crazy?

  1. I miss days without cell phone


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